Tell No One
by ParisAmy
Summary: Five years ago Kate died. Sawyer was left devastated. Today…she emailed him. Sequel up; Life Goes On.
1. Tell No One

Tell No-One

Five years ago Kate died. Sawyer was left devastated. Today…she emailed him.

Sawyer walked along the long corridor to his apartment, he reached deep into his pockets trying to find the key, clutching it tightly in his hand he fumbled with it as he tried to unlock the door. Sauntering in he noticed a piece of paper folded in two. He opened it carefully. 'Check your email F' Sawyer laughed, stupid kids posting rubbish under the door.

Walking in further he through the note on the sideboard, but as did he glanced at the last letter. F. What did it mean? Was it a mistake? Or was there more to the F than he first thought?

The writing was neat, not one of a stupid teenage boy. It was quick and to the point. As he moved closer to the sofa, sitting down on it gently he thought of what the F could mean. Was it a mistake? Did it mean anything at all? Then he realised. How could he forget? But it wasn't possible. Was it?

He didn't care if it was or wasn't possible after all he'd been through if there was one chance that it might be then he was going to take it.

He reached frantically to the coffee table, grabbing the laptop with one hand and switched it on. Five minutes later he scanned his emails, a few junk ones and an anonymous one. He opened it up. It read. '16:15pm tomorrow. Click on the link. Watch. Wait for me. Freckles. Whatever you do, tell no one'

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**I know it was short, most of my fics start with a short opening. I just cant break the habit. LOL But let me know what you think, it really helps me carry on writing! Coz Sometimes I get spark-less and don't want to carry on. Please review! **


	2. Freckles?

Freckles?

Was it her? Was it really his Freckles? His Kate? It couldn't be, it wasn't possible. But why was he sat waiting? Watching the computer clock, counting down the minutes, the seconds, to see what was going to happen?

16:10pm- Sawyer sat on the sofa, laptop on knee. Waiting.

16:11pm- He leaned over to the coffee table, taking a small sip of his drink. He had a feeling he was going to need it.

16:12pm- His knee began shaking. Impatience was taking over.

16:13pm- Two minutes left.

16:14pm- He began to open yesterdays email. Moving the mouse over the link, waiting for the clock to change. It felt like New Years Eve. Everyone waits impatiently for the clock to strike twelve, looking round desperately for someone to share the New Year with.

16:15pm- He took a deep breath in, unsure of what he was going to unearth. He clicked the link.

A busy street, peoples backs to the camera as they walked quickly, all of them trying to get in front of the person in front of them. People in business suits, clutching briefcases, busy shoppers carrying bags, children running trying to catch up with their mother or father. It was like a race. New people appeared on the screen every second. He looked at the surroundings. They was in a city, but he couldn't tell which. It was a busy one though, all he could see was people surrounded by never ending buildings. Sawyer sat back in the sofa. Was this some joke? Had Kate ever emailed him?

But he kept watching, waiting as more people, more faces flashed across the screen. He checked the small, digital laptop clock. 16:15pm still.

Then from out of nowhere a women caught his eye. She stopped and looked directly at the camera. He recognized her instantly. Memories he thought he'd forgotten came flooding back. His mouth was hanging open, his tried to speak but couldn't find his voice. Eventually he said the word that was burning in the back of his throat.

"Freckles?"

He stared more intently at the screen. Leaning closer, just to make sure his eyes wasn't deceiving him. She stood a few seconds the turned and walked away, blending in with the other busy shoppers and workers. He watched her walk right out of the cameras view, the last glint of her he saw was her chocolate brown hair blowing against the light wind.

Now what? The women he loved hadn't died. She was alive. How?

He got up from the sofa. Paced the floor in his apartment. Thoughts spun around his head. Who posted the letter? How? Why was this happening? Was it really happening?

He looked back at the laptop, people still walking by, but she didn't appear again, he searched the tiny space for her but she was gone. The more he tried to think of the women he saw, the blurrier the vision of her got. Was it really her? Did he see her? Or was he just seeing what he wanted to see?

Then the laptop made that noise. That noise when you get an email. He always found it annoying but today, today his heart skipped a beat as he clicked back to his inbox, leaving the camera full of people behind. It was anonymous again. Clicking the link he took in what it read. 'Tell no one'

Why did she keep repeating it? Why was it so important for him to 'tell no one'?

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**Thanks for all the reviews!! So you like this fic?? Again sorry for the short chap, please review if you are enjoying reading this. Then I know to carry on. Even if you write like one word. That's fine! LOL Thanks for reading, please review. (Next chap is longer. I promise!) **


	3. Where Are You?

Where Are You?

The days that went by felt like weeks as he checked his email, constantly waiting for her to get in contact again. But still there was nothing. No email. No note.

He had kept the link. He watched it over and over. Everyday new people walked that street, passed them buildings, but Kate never did. He waited and waited hoping she'd walk past the camera again. Where was she? He constantly asked questions, critically analysing the scene he was seeing. What street? What state? What country?

The more questions he asked, the more questions he came across. He stayed in, constantly, pacing the floor, looking out of the window, waiting for her to make the next move. But the more he waited, the more impatient he became. And the more impatient he became the more he began to question the email. Was this some kind of sick joke? But how? He had seen her. Hadn't he? He had even began to question himself.

Then it came to him. It was almost as if the one thing he hadn't thought about, smacked him right in the face. How did she post the note without being seen? It was right in front of him the whole time. The note was the key to it all. Or so he thought. If she posted the note. She had to be here. In LA. Maybe in the apartment block.

He raced for the door, grabbing his jacket on the way out. He walked along his corridor, if she came here someone was bound to have seen her. No one goes unnoticed. He banged loud and hard on the first door. His neighbour. No one answered. He banged louder.

"Yes…" The elderly man stared at him.

"Have ya seen a women….long brown hair…freckles across her face…she came a few days ago?"

"No sorry" The man replied shutting the door in his face. What? How couldn't he have seen her. Neighbours are supposed to be nosey. Always sticking their head around the curtains. That's why everyone hated their neighbours, they were meant to see things you didn't want them to see, or even you yourself didn't see.

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A hour later and all he got was 'Sorry' or no answer and sometimes he had the door shut in his face. Then there was the cute blonde from across the corridor, in shorts and the tiniest top he had ever seen, she said she needed some help 'fixing' the cold tap. Who fixes there tap in shorts and a t-shirt saying 'all aboard'? He politely refused. She probably hadn't seen her. She probably still read books with pictures.

He sauntered back to his apartment, how was it possible that no one saw her? How was it possible to go unseen? He unlocked the door and made his way towards the laptop. He checked his email again. There was one new one. His heart skipped a beat. His mouth felt dry. He clicked the link and read.

'Tell no one'

He tried to scroll down but there was no more. That's all it said. 'Tell no one' he already new that. He hadn't told anyone. Except asking half the apartment block if they'd seen a brunette women, with freckles a few days ago. He deleted the message, then heard that unfamiliar sound of a new email. He clicked the link again and read the message.

'Be patient. Wait.'

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One week later and he still hadn't heard anything. All he did was stay in. Wait. He opened the new email. Taking a deep breath before he read it.

'Meet me. By the lake at noon.'

Sawyer looked at the clock. 11:30. He had thirty minutes.

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Slowly walking towards the lake, he sat down on the nearby bench. He looked around, taking in his surroundings. No one was about. He checked his watch 11:55- Five minutes. He turned his body around, so he could see the footpath leading to the lake.

12:00- His heart began beating faster, as he knew soon he would see his Kate. His freckles.

12:05- No one came.

12:10- The path was still empty.

12:15. Maybe she got stuck in traffic? Maybe she forget the time?

12:20. Still no one.

12:25. Where was she?

12:30. He left.

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He walked back into his apartment, he felt used and hurt. Why didn't she show? Was this all just some sick game? It certainly looked like it now. But still he checked his email. There was one. Anonymous. Like all the others. He clicked the familiar link. He heart no longer beated harder at the site of it, all the emails were doing was giving him false hope, and he hated it.

'I never knew you was that patient. Please keep waiting. It wont be long'

Was she there? Had she watched him? Why didn't she approach him?

He heard the email sound again and flicked back to his inbox.

'Annie Parker Flightline Motel'

He knew immediately what she wanted him to do. He got a pad and pen from a nearby draw and began.

Dear Freckles,

Why didn't you show? I waited and waited but you never came. Did you see me? I thought you were dead and now you decide to contact me. What's happened Kate? Who else knows?

Sawyer.

He didn't know what to put. All he had was questions. Questions that he probably wasn't even going to get the answers to. He scribbled the fake name on the front of the envelope and drove to the motel. The door clicked open and he delivered it to the man at the desk. He just hoped she got it.

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**Thanks for all the reviews I got last chap!! Your awesome! Ok next chap you will find out why Kate asked Sawyer to 'tell no one' Thanks so much for reading please review and let me know what you think, then I know if your enjoying it so I'll keep writing. **


	4. James

James

"_You can't run away from trouble. There ain't no place that far." - James Baskett. _

Dear Sawyer,

I'm sorry. I really am but I had to go, I knew it was only a matter of time before the cops showed. I guess I was right. They're still after me and I know they're getting closer, I have to be careful. Yes I saw you at the lake and I wanted to come over so bad but I couldn't. I don't know if anyone's watching me. It's a big city and I have to be careful. There's more cops and more people who will be able to see me or recognise me. No one knows. Not Jack, not no one. Just you. Sawyer I have someone I want you to meet. Meet me. Same place. Same time as before. Remember tell no one.

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He read the letter slowly taking in every word. But their was one line that grabbed him every time, he said it in his head over and over, trying to work out who. Who did she want him to meet?

He was early again. He watched, constantly looking over his shoulder. Then he saw her, her hair tied back, she gave a brief smile at him and he rose from the bench.

"Hey"

"Hey" Kate mimicked, pulling him into her. She felt so safe in his arms, the world couldn't reach her, couldn't harm her as she stayed wrapped in those arms. Eventually she pulled away, her eyes glistening with tears.

"Where have ya been?" Sawyer asked, as he caught the falling tear with his hand.

"….About"

"You ok?"

"…Yeah….you?" Kate asked, suddenly feeling awkward, she hadn't spoken or seen him in five years, but to her he still looked the same as the last time she saw him.

"Better now….now that I've seen you….now I know your ok" Sawyer replied as he watched another tear fall down her pale, freckled skin. Her eyes no longer glistened or glowed. They were dead. Just like he thought she was for all those years. But now, looking at her, she could have been. The former smile, that pulled at his heart strings was no longer their, it was forced and weak. She wasn't the Kate he knew, she wasn't the Kate he fell in love with and most of all she wasn't his freckles. They, the supposed people that are meant to protect you, the police, had torn her apart, ripped her down, caged her, made her run, she looked exhausted, he knew and she knew, this wasn't her. This was the women she'd become. Cold and hard. Unattached and weak.

"I'm sorry….y'know…. for everything…I never wanted it to work out like that" Kate answered, her head down.

"I know….its ok…" Sawyer bent his head down to hers then straightened himself, lifting her head up with his hands. "So…who do you want me to meet?" Sawyer finally asked, the question had plagued his mind all morning. She didn't reply, she walked away from him, constantly looking around. Sawyer followed. They got to her car and she indicated at the backseat.

A little blonde haired boy, lay asleep in his car seat, his small hands wrapped around a blanket that covered his body. He must have been about four years old. Was she going to tell him he was his? He couldn't be a father. He didn't know how. But the little boy, his blonde hair, the small dimples that could slightly be seen through the window. They were his traits, he was Sawyers, he himself couldn't deny it, he wouldn't deny it. He sighed loudly, shaking his head a little, before putting his head in his hands and looking up. Astonishment spread across his face. He had a son. He and Kate, they had a son.

"I cant do this anymore Sawyer…it…it isn't fair on him…I want you to take him…take him and don't try to find me….ev-"

"Kate…I-I cant…" Sawyer interrupted, turning round and leaning his body on the car.

"Yes…yes you can" Kate opened the back door and lifted the sleeping boy out. "Tell him…tell him that I will _always _love him" Kate kissed him and placed him gently in Sawyers arms, also leaving a blue bag by his feet, Sawyer tried to grab her but couldn't as the boy shifted in his arms. "His name is James" Kate smiled, tears falling rapidly down her cheek as she shut the door and turned the car engine on.

"No!…Kate…Kate!" Sawyer tried to run after her, tell her she couldn't run for ever, but the boy began to wake and started to cry. He started to cry for the person that had left him behind. His mommy.

"Hey…hey don't cry" Sawyer rubbed his back gently, he didn't know how to look after a four year old. He didn't want to look after him on his own. He wanted Kate and so did James. They both wanted the women that was born to run.

"Where's mommy?" The little boy looked around at his surroundings and began to shift, Sawyer found it hard to hold onto him but eventually got a good grip and the boy settled down, but felt uneasy against him.

"Erm….well she had to go for a while…but were gona find her" Sawyer looked into his blue eyes, tears began to form and he didn't know what to do. He wasn't a daddy. He didn't know how to be one.

"I _want _my mommy!" James began to scream and kick against Sawyer's clutch, tears spilled down his cheeks like Kate's had.

"Hey come on…mommy's coming back soon…I promise" Sawyer spoke softly, not wanting to upset him again. Suddenly he stopped, his attention on Sawyer.

"Who are you?" James asked, whimpering a little.

"Well….I knew your mommy…a long time ago" Sawyer signed placing the little boy on the ground and taking him by the hand as they began to walk, Sawyer looked back one last time, the road that Kate had drove down, Sawyer was going to drive down. One day, sometime soon, for James, for himself, for their newly found family. Sawyer would drive down that road, follow his heart and find Kate, before it was too late.

"_You can't run away from trouble. There ain't no place that far."_

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**Ok, I was a little unsure about this chap, mainly the way it was going. So I need you to review. Did you like it? Was it what you expected? Please let me know, I beg. Now its obvious Sawyer and James will go and find Kate, do you like that idea?? I'm going to have them spend a few days together, Sawyer doesn't know where she's going so, y'know he'll need to ask James things and try to work out were Kate might have gone. Kate will still be apart of the fic though. Anyways thanks for reading and to the people that have reviewed! Your great!! Ideas are welcome, though I have the next few chaps written, things can always be added.**

**Next chap a flashback of what happened when they was rescued. **


	5. Past Memories

Past Memories

_The airport was busy, the sound of people chatting to each other echoed in your ears, some people were looking frustrated, confused, tired. Others were stood silently in lines waiting to get checked in, some people were gazing around taking in their surroundings. Some people were stood idly talking to each other while others tried to get past them. Children were pushing each other, babies were crying, teenagers had music blasting into their ears. While across the airport the oceanic flight 815 survivors stood talking, some hugging each other, as this might be 'goodbye.' _

"_So freckles…whatcha wana do now we got off the rock?" Sawyers hand tightened around Kate's as he sensed her nervousness. _

"…_I duno…what do you wana do?" Kate replied, smiling back at him, hoping she was convincing him that nothing was wrong. _

"_I gota lot of answers to that one" Sawyer smirked as he lost contact with her eyes once again._

"…_I love you" Kate's eyes returned to his, a weak, forced smile appeared on her face . "…Wait here, I'll be back in five minutes…ok?" Kate smiled once again before slipping her hand from his and hurrying through the airport. _

"…_Were ya goin?" Sawyer called after her, she turned and held up her hand, signalling to him 'five minutes' Sawyer looked for a clock, an uneasy feeling crept in his stomach. He didn't know why he wasn't going with her, slowly following behind. He just didn't know. _

_Five minutes came and she never came back. Ten minutes and still nothing. He saw Jack walking in his direction, coming from were Kate had dashed off too. _

"_Hey…Jack" Sawyer reached out to grab the passing man, who turned quickly to face him. "Have ya seen Kate?" _

"…_No sorry, I was looking for her myself…I'll tell her your looking for her if I see her" Jack replied. Sawyer nodded and began to walk in the direction she went. _

_The he saw why she left. Why she ran. The cop cars pulled up, four police men stepped out, stalking towards the flight survivors. Sawyer didn't wait. He ran. _

_---------------_

"Where are we?" the little boy looked round the apartment taking in his surroundings carefully.

"This is my place" Sawyer sighed, the little boy looked up at him and he gave him a weak smile.

"...When's mommy comin'?"

"...Hey you must be tired...erm...lets...wait there a sec" Sawyer quickly changed the subject, dashing into the spare room and laying sheets on the bed. James slowly followed behind.

"When's mommy coming?" James asked again, Sawyer ignored him and carried on straightening the sheets, even though James was going to be laying in them soon. "Is she comin' soon?" James lent over the bed, trying to see Sawyers face. He didn't answer again, hoping he would drop the subject. Soon. He was wrong, very wrong. "I want mommy!….when's she coming?" He continued to pester. Sawyer patience was running thin and he gritted his teeth.

"So…what do you have in your bag?" Sawyer asked, though he was unzipping it as he spoke.

"_I want_ _mommy_!" James whined, his tone beginning to whimper as though any second he was going to burst into tears. Sawyer took a deep breath, he wasn't going to loose it now, he saw the pyjamas on top and pulled them out, throwing the bag back onto the floor. Tears were falling fast from James eyes, he was screaming and crying and he just wouldn't stop. Sawyer walked out. James followed, wiping his eyes. Sawyer blocked the crying out, thinking of what Kate would do if she was here, she would soothe him, rub his back, kiss him and tell him everything was going to be alright. Then again he wouldn't be crying if she was here.

"Hey…" Sawyers voice was loud but not scary, almost enthusiastic as though they was going to go and do something fun. "…How about you go to bed and….and…I'll…read you a story" Sawyer said it quick, taking it back after he'd said it, he was really going to read a four year old that was stood in front of him screaming his lungs out a story. But then, the crying stopped, the whimpering stopped, he walked into his room and reappeared minutes later changed into pyjamas, his tear stained cheeks still visible but he seemed fine, like none of it happened. Sawyer rose from the sofa, James looked up at him, eyes wide, Sawyer wondered if it was fear, or something else. He walked through to the bedroom and climbed up onto the bed, wrapping the covers around him, Sawyer laid next to him, like a father would, his little head nestled into his shoulder as he opened the nearly battered book. "A long time ago this book washed up on shore….along with the drink" Sawyer mumbled to himself, a smile tugging at his lips as he relived past memories. If it wasn't for the book, he'd never have had that kiss. James just looked up, not understanding what he meant, Sawyer sensed this and looked down at him, but his eyes were down back on the open book. James seemed so at ease with him, he didn't understand why, he was rude and fowl tempered. He began to speak, the words were drawled slowly, creating a relaxed and peaceful atmosphere. "The primroses were over. Toward the edge of the wood, where the ground became open and sloped down to an old fence and a brambly ditch beyond, only a few fading patches of pale yellow still showed among the dog's mercury and the oak-tree roots." It was only the first line, yet he was already asleep.

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Sawyer sat on the sofa, eyes fixed on the laptop. She had to email. She just had too. Once in a while his eyes would wonder the room, he would loose himself with thoughts. He had a son. He was part of him. He was part of Kate. Suddenly the pattering of feet pulled him back into reality, and he hit it hard as the little boy stood in front of him rubbing his eyes softly with his small hand that was cupped into a fist.

"What do you eat?" Sawyers voice came across as hard, although he wasn't, he was scared. What if the crying started again? What if he asked for Kate? What would he say? She coming soon? But he knew she wasn't.

"Food" James replied.

"Oh yeah, I eat that too."

"….Is mommy back?" James asked as he followed Sawyer through to the kitchen.

Oh god he asked, Sawyer's mouth felt dry as he slowly drawled. "….No" Sawyer turned round and saw the boys face, crumpled as though he was going to cry any second. "She'll be back soon though" Sawyer tried to smile, reassure him everything was going to be ok, but he didn't know, he had no idea.

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The glass door opened and a bell above it rang, a middle aged man entered, dressed in jeans and a white shirt, his dark sunglasses shielded his eyes from the blinding sun that came pouring through the windows. He slowly walked over to the desk, handing the man behind it a poster labelled 'Wanted'

The bell rang again, another man entered, now standing beside the first. "This time we got her"

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**Thanks for reading and to the people that have reviewed! Your awesome!! Please review i really ****appreciate it and it helps me write better chaps! (am i convincing you to review:P)**** Anyways let me know what you think, good? bad? Thanks :D **

**Next chap is called New Leads- you can have a little ponder about that :P **

**Oh why dont you have a look at my one-shot 'In your dreams' **


	6. New Leads

New Leads

Night came faster than he expected, it had been two days and still no email. Sawyer watched as James' eyes began to flicker shut, he yawned and Sawyer watched his rhythmatic breathing. He slowly walked over to him, careful not to wake him. He gently lifted him up and he felt his body tense and his head shoot up, his body ridged in his arms and he pulled away from Sawyers chest, Sawyer gently rubbed his back and he relaxed against his touch. He walked through to his room and settled him down on the bed, his eyes closed and Sawyer walked through to his own.

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"Its too dark" James whimpered, Sawyer mumbled something into his pillow, turning away from the door and hoping he would just leave. "Its too dark!"

"Yeah…its called night" Sawyer replied, turning to face him, only to find him climbing up onto the bed next to him. "What ya doin'?"

"Its too dark"

"I know…I've heard you like twenty billion times" Sawyer grumbled, pulling a pillow over his head.

"I'm scared" James laid his head on the other pillow and looked at what could barely be seen of Sawyers face.

"What of?"

"….The dark"

"Well….what ya want me to do?" Sawyer asked.

"…I don't know" James relaxed against the pillow and Sawyer sighed heavily again. He was not sleeping in here.

"Come on…" Sawyer got up and walked into James room, James ran behind him, clinging to his leg as he entered. "Lay down" Sawyer pointed to the bed, rubbing one of his eyes, James laid down and Sawyer laid next to him, pulling the book out of the dresser draw, starting were he finished. "…On the other side of the fence, the upper part of the field was full of rabbit holes. In places the grass was gone altogether and everywhere there were clusters of dry droppings, through which nothing but the ragwort would grow. A hundred yards away, at the bottom-"

"How'd they know it was a 'undred yards away?" James interrupted.

"Do ya even know what yards are?"

"…No"

"Well shut up and listen….of the slope, ran the brook, no more than three feet wide, half choked with kingcups, watercress and blue brooklime.-"

"What's bukline?"

"Brooklime" Sawyer corrected.

"What is it?"

"Will ya just listen!….The cart track crossed by a brick culvert and climbed the opposite slope to a five-barred gate in the thorn hedge. The gate led into the lane" Sawyer paused and James looked up at him, waiting for him to go on. He looked at James, he couldn't believe he was doing this again, he'd only ever read on the island but now, now he was reading to his son.

James nudged him, slowly yawning. "Go on"

"The May sunset was red in clouds, and there was still half an hour to twilight. The dry slope was dotted with rabbits -- some nibbling at the thin grass near their holes, others pushing further down to look for dandelions or perhaps a cowslip that the rest had missed. Here and there one sat upright on an ant heap and looked about, with ears erect and nose in the wind. But a blackbird, singing undisturbed on the outskirts of the wood, showed that there was nothing alarming there, and in the other direction, along the brook, all was plain to be seen, empty and quiet. The warren was at peace." Sawyer looked down, James head rested on his shoulder, eyes tightly closed. He gently lifted his body off the bed and went back to his own room, closing the door quietly behind him.

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"…_Wait here, I'll be back in five minutes…ok?" She smiled before slipping her hand away from his, she hurried through the airport, people stepping in her way as she did. Maybe she wasn't supposed to do this, maybe this was some kind of warning, maybe she wasn't supposed to run. But her feet kept moving, her heart kept beating faster and faster with every growing second. She could faintly her Sawyer call after her. She turned briefly, held up her hand, signalling five minutes. She didn't want to look back, it would be to hard. But she did, and it was too hard. Images flashed through her head. The waterfall, boar hunting, the cages, she would never forget, she couldn't, but if she looked back again, like she wanted to, see his face one more time, she might have to turn around. Do something that has become unthinkable. But what she feared the most though, was that he wasn't coming after her, she knew he knew deep down she was running, and he never came after her. He was letting her go. _

_Her feet pounded the tiled floor, as she made her way to the exit, she'd run to long to be caught now. Then she saw Jack, heading right for her, if he saw her, he'd only persuade her to come back with him, tell her he'd fix everything. But he couldn't, some things were meant to be broken. _

_She stopped and watched him, his head darting in every direction, as though he was looking for someone, finally he moved on, walking in the direction she'd come from. _

_She found herself in the parking lot. What was she going to do now? Steal a car? No she couldn't, she'd just stand out more. Maybe she could hitch a ride? No, what if people noticed her, seen her on the news? Or she could just run. Why break the habit of a lifetime?_

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Sawyer watched as the little boy's eyes was fixed on the TV screen, he sat on the laptop, he checked his email, watched the street that he had watched countless times. She hadn't wrote. Hadn't emailed. Where was she?

"James" Sawyer leant forward, the boys eyes moving slowly to his.

"…Yeah" James answered, his eyes flickering from Sawyer to the TV, Sawyer cleared his throat as he suddenly felt nervous about asking a four year old some questions. But maybe it wasn't the questions he was scared about asking. Maybe it was the answers he was going to hear.

Sawyer tried to think of a question to ask him, he had to find Kate. Now. He couldn't wait, she hadn't emailed in days and he was beginning to think she never would. "….When ya was with your mommy….did you live in a lot of houses?" Sawyer asked trying to get an idea if they moved around a lot, the little boys eyes diverted to the screen again. "James…" The name felt unusual as it rolled off his tongue, his voice a little louder but not loud enough to scare him. "Did ya go in the car a lot?" Sawyer tried to rephrase the question, hoping he would understand.

"Erm…Yep…I fink…mommy loved goin' to new places…she said it was fun" James replied, shifting slightly in the armchair, Sawyer thought about his next question carefully. James wouldn't know the names of the states he went to. After all he was only four. He would only remember landmarks. Like a park or a fun place were they went.

"Where did you go with mommy James…did you go anywhere fun?"

"We went to see the big space rockets!" James jumped up in his seat, a huge smile appearing on his face, as he remembered happy times. "When's mommy coming back?…I miss her"

"…Erm soon pal…real soon" Sawyer answered before leaning back into the sofa, thinking of space rockets or something that might look like a space rocket to a four year old.

Space rockets. Sawyer sighed he had no idea. What did he mean? Was it an actual space rocket? Was it a ride? Or one you find in a park that you can play on?

"…Did you play on the rockets?"

"No…we watched them" James replied rolling his eyes like Sawyer was stupid. Sawyer caught it and smiled, Kate rolled her eyes too.

"How long ago did you go?"

"Erm…I don't know" James shrugged, suddenly casting his eyes back on the TV show he was watching. "…When's mommy coming?"

"I don't know James!" Sawyer yelled, mentally kicking himself after, he'd coped with the biggest crying fit in history, well to him it was, yet one question and suddenly he lost it. This just proved it even more, he wasn't ready to be a father. Maybe he could never be one. He flopped back on the sofa and ran his hands through his hair. He could hear James begin to whimper and closed his eyes praying the four year old wouldn't cry.

Too late. Tears was falling rapidly down his cheek, as he began to scream for his mom.

"I-I want mommy!"

"…Look!" Sawyer once again yelled above the racket. "You cant have her…" His tone still harsh which only made James cry more. "….You gota be a big boy…ok?" This time his tone soft and gentle, like he actually cared about his feelings. James nodded and Sawyer began to rise from the chair, going out into James bedroom, bringing back his blue bag, once again he sat back down, riffling through the bag, taking everything out. Then, he found what he wanted, a ticket, from Space Kennedy. That was the rockets James was speaking about. The date, the time everything he needed was on it. He glanced at the date. 15th. That was one week ago. She must have only arrived in LA a day or two ago. But now, and the answer he really needed to know was. Where was she now?

--------------------------------

The phone on the desk rang loudly, so much so that it echoed in the now quiet building.

"Hey there's someone for you downstairs…claming y'know the whole back from the dead thing"

"Trust me, she isn't and this…this is just…another false lead…but we'll get her…sooner or later" The cold, raspy voice answered as he laid back into his leather chair, feet on the desk as he sipped on a cup of coffee.

"Yeah well….the women's downstairs."

"She aint dead Carl" The officer called after him.

"Then tell me how the hell someone survives that?…you saw the car after it was pulled out….she didn't survive, and this ghost your chasing, tell me something…is it to prove me wrong…or for your he chased her all that time and something tells me you're a little mad that he died when he finally caught her…so now, you think that if you chase and catch a women that died many years ago, your somehow honouring his memory"

"Send her up…"

The women entered the room, he could hear her coming as her shoes clicked loudly on the wooden floor. He watched her as she stalked over, a women with a target in mind. He liked that, somehow he felt this one was the one, this was the lead he was waiting for, she had finally slipped up and someone was there to witness it.

"I think I've seen Katherine Austin…" She began, making herself comfy as she sat down on the chair opposite the man, whose legs were still sprawled out across the desk. "She's staying in the motel next to me"

"What?!" The now impatient voice replied, feet hurtling to the ground and he sat up in the chair, grabbing a notepad and pen.

"The motel next to me"

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**Thanks for reading and to the people that have reviewed! Your great!! So please review, let me know what you thought. Next chap will be better. I promise. **


	7. Newspaper Articles

Newspaper Articles. 

'_Fugitive dead'_

_Sawyers eyes glanced over the article, flipping the page, then quickly flipping back, he read it again. 'Fugitive dead' He scanned the text, it couldn't have been her. _

_He read on; 'Wanted fugitive, Katherine Austin was very nearly caught, as detective Brandon Mars, son of Edward Mars who finally caught her many years ago, only to die in fateful plane crash 815, finally found her in Wyoming. _

_The text continued, 'Detective Mars, the man that just about brought her to justice.' Sawyer didn't care. What happened to her? _

_Then, near the end of the text, it all came out, his eyes widened as he read the black and white print. _

'_Her car spun out of control, falling many feet into a fast flowing river, Detective Mars ran down and watched as the car sank. Detective Mars called for back-up and a team of divers began searching the river in an hour. Only to prove unsuccessful as no body was found. Its presumed that the current swept Katherine's body down stream and its almost impossible that it will ever be found, but rest assured coroner Davies predicts her as dead, saying 'It is virtually impossible for anyone to survive such currents, and among that deadly impact there are also large rocks which she would have hit and been knocked unconscious leading to her death. _

'Back from the dead, sighting of wanted fugitive in Austin, Texas'

Sawyer stared at the words, unable to take his eyes of off them. He wanted to get up, move, jump in the car and just drive to find her, protect her, but his legs wouldn't let him, his mind was telling his feet to move, but they wouldn't, his eyes fixed on those dreaded words. Then thoughts skipped his mind. This was yesterdays paper. Had they caught her by now? After all these years. Did she know? Had she moved on? Where?

He didn't have anymore time to think, he grabbed James bag, along with James and jumped in his car. He had to find her. Tonight.

------------------------------

He'd been to every motel in town, knocked on every door, waiting for her to answer, explain why all of this happened like it did. He was just about thinking of giving up, she'd moved on, until James shouted from the backseat.

"Mommy!" He fidgeted and started trying to pull the straps of the car seat open, Sawyer stopped the car, looking where she was walking. There was no where out here, just open land.

Thoughts spun in his head, what was she doing? Suddenly he wound the window down and found himself shouting her, she turned rapidly and saw him leaning against the car door, James battling his way to get out.

"Need a ride?"

---------------------

They hadn't spoken the whole journey, just silent glances and weak smiles. Just the echoing of James voice talking about everything, apparently pleased to see his mom, kept them from going their separate ways.

He was sat on the chair, she was on the bed. She couldn't read him like she used to be able to, his eyes dark and angry, head down so his face was now out of sight. Occasionally he would look up, blue eyes glancing through the dirty blonde hair would catch hers, she would smile weakly, hoping she could provoke some kind of emotion. She didn't care what it was, as long as their was something, anything for her to build on.

"Kate…" Sawyer sighed, so did get Kate, he was mad, at least it was something but she couldn't help feel disappointed, she wasn't Kate, she was freckles. "Why?…I-we could have worked this out…"

"No….no we couldn't…you cant…we cant…" Kate gave up, sighing once again, this wasn't supposed to work out like this. Kate was supposed to leave her son with him and vanish, just like she'd always done. Sawyer was supposed to give him the life he deserved. "Just…lets just forget about it…just for now…_please_" Kate begged him silently, her eyes glazing over with tears ready to spill any second, he looked deep into them, she looked so much like James when he was about to cry, how his lips would purse and tremble, then his eyes gradually growing wider till they was full with tears, then any second would fall rapidly down his face, dripping on the end of his cheeks, to fall more.

"Mommy!….look" James called from across the room. "I coloured this for you" James walked over to them, holding the picture high above his head, as he fell into Kate's arms, she watched Sawyers face look at the little boy, she could hear James babbling on about the colours and how he just went out the lines a tiny bit, but that didn't matter because you couldn't see it that much. Eventually Sawyer caught her eyes on his, and he jumped almost too scared to let her see his real feelings for the little boy, James. His son.

"James…" Kate began turning him in her arms to face Sawyer. Sawyer jumped up, sensing what she was about to do.

She began speaking, words tumbling out of her mouth that she couldn't take back, as the little boy looked up at him in awe. Sawyer backed away, all of a sudden he felt suffocated, suddenly attached to the child.

"This is your daddy…" Kate finished, hoping it wouldn't all end it cries and screams, doors slamming that would never be re-opened.

There was no cries or screams, just the door pounding against the frame, then bouncing back again, as he'd slammed it to hard. She felt the cool breeze on her face, the weight off her shoulders as the truth was out.

------------

He returned, later that night, he walked through to a tiny spare room, to find James asleep. Then he heard the sound of her voice, coming from the bedroom, he pushed the door open and leant against the frame, arms crossed in front of him. The light from the hallway slowly revealing her face. She was gradually sitting up, propping her body against the pillows behind her.

He searched her face for what she had said, not wanting to speak, or maybe just being to stubborn to be the first. She rolled her eyes, again he sensed she knew him all to well.

"I said….he asked if I was going to read him the book" Kate smiled, making Sawyer bow his head, as if he didn't want her to read him anymore.

"He wouldn't shut up so…..I read him Watership Down…" Sawyer admitted, moving closer, into the room. Kate moved to one side, pulling back the sheets as he laid his body next to hers, it suddenly all came back. Memories of being inside his tent, she closed her eyes and heard the sound of the waves lapping the shore, as she drifted back to the island, when nobody would have guessed that would be the most easiest times of their lives.

---------------

12:49pm

He turned over and looked at the clock again. He'd woken up nearly every half hour. He didn't know why. He didn't want to admit why.

He watched as she slept peacefully, her features mimicking James'. He pulled her closer to him, she sighed deeply and he thought she was going to wake up, but she didn't, she laid her arms across his chest and snuggled into him, his warmth on her, hers on him. His eyes began to close once and again, feeling the power of sleep draw over him, his eyes shut.

-------------------

The sun shone through the parting in the curtains, his hand reaching over to her side of the bed, he felt for her, the sun blinding his vision. He only felt the rumpled sheets and the warmth of the pillow were her head had been.

"Kate?" He rubbed his eyes, trying to see beyond the door, stumbling out of the bedroom, he called again, hoping, waiting for her reply. He stopped unable to go any further he knew she'd gone his mind working over time as he began to 'What if'

What if she gone to get breakfast?, What if she was in James' room and she just hadn't heard him?, What if she'd gone for a walk?, What if she'd fell and was unable to hear him?

He laughed to himself, its funny the things you think off when you don't want to believe the truth.

What if she'd ran?

"You run, I con" he murmured under his breath, before entering James room. He was still there. She'd left him behind again.

------------------

"She's dead!…you was there yourself, the car, the rocks, the current was to strong for her to swim in…it ain't possible Brandon"

"Well maybe it wasn't…all this time on the run…she's a pro….she can hide, swim, climb, she's like a fugitive action man for gods sake!"

"Ok….say, and this is all I'm doing Brandon…say she is alive, she did survive and she is staying in a motel next to some women that has claims it's her….what the hell we gona do?"

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**Thanks to all those that keep reading and reviewing! Your the best:P Ok next chap Kate makes a surprising ****revelation. **


	8. Because You Love Her

Because You Love Her

"No matter how many times I tell you she'll break you heart, or how many times she does it, you'll never give up, Why you ask?...because you love her."

-----------

"Told ya" The man, Officer Brandon Mars grinned

"Told me what?"

"She aint dead…this, this is her...and were gona get her."

"…The art of surprise" Carl replied.

"The art of what?!"

"Surprise….me and you, if she isn't dead me and you…lets go to this motel….wait around a while and see what we find…no-ones there, she ain't expecting anyone…the art of surprise"

"….Sometimes I wonder why I'm paired with you"

"So? That a yes?"

------------------

"Come on James…get your stuff were goin" Sawyer mumbled as he gathered James' clothes and stuffed them in his bag.

"Is mommy coming?" James replied, picking up his backpack and packing his colouring book, then throwing some loose crayons in as well.

Sawyer didn't answer, just picked him up and walked out of the bedroom, picking up his car keys from the small table and shoving them in his pocket as he tried to juggle James in his arms and pick up the backpack, which he passed to James, who held it loosely in his clutch.

Sawyer walked out into the parking lot of the motel, James shifting impatiently in his arms as Sawyer tried to pull his keys out from his pocket, fiddling with them as he again tried to juggle James in his arms along with his backpack, that kept hitting him every time he tried to lower James to the ground. A man, young with brown hair began walking towards him. Sawyer watched him from the corner of his eye as he placed James on the ground before opening the car door, and watching him struggle to get into his car seat.

"Excuse me…have you just been staying in that motel…right there" He turned and pointed, a smug smile on his face that Sawyer didn't like.

"Yep…why?" Sawyer reluctantly replied, before turning to watch James who was taking out every crayon in his bag and then trying to throw them back in.

"I have reason to believe that someone was staying their that really shouldn't have been."

"….No-one but me and the kid" Sawyer answered, snatching the green crayon from James' hand and himself throwing it in his backpack, much to the delight of James who clapped and laughed before giving his a proud pat on the shoulder.

"Can I take your name please?" The man asked, the question more of an order. Sawyer looked carefully at the man, buckling James' car seat straps tight to which he frowned and let out a small 'Ow'

"Who the hell are you?"

"Officer Brandon Mars" He held out his hand, Sawyer looked at it, obviously refusing to shake and when Brandon realised, put his hand back in his pocket. "Name please"

"S-James Ford why?"

"Thanks James"

Sawyer watched as the man returned to his car, getting in his own as he did, he started the engine and drove out of the motel. He had to warn Kate.

-----

"Who'd you say Kate had a little love interest with?"

"What?…some guy called James something…why?"

"That my friend…is James Ford and that women, Rachael Brennan saw Kate in the motel he just left…and our new friend James has a kid…"

"So?, that's her kid and he knows she's alive and was taking him to visit her?…we gona follow him?…hope he leads us to her?"

"A rat will always lead you to his hole"

-----------------

"Why isn't mommy comin?" James asked, to which Sawyer ignored. "Why isn't mommy comin" James repeated, this time kicking the back of Sawyers chair to get his attention. When he didn't answer James kicked it harder and started to whine repeating his question over and over again.

"Look!…" Sawyer yelled, which made James immediately stop kicking and screaming. "She's comin soon!…Just shut up and _stop _kicking!" James shrunk back in his seat, and began looking out of the window.

A pang of guilt waved over Sawyer for speaking to him like that. But what was he supposed to do? Tell him everything was going to be alright and mommy was on her way home as we speak? He didn't even know where she was. Didn't know whether she'd come back. Or whether he'd find he again.

He looked back and saw his eyes glazing over with tears as he sniffled, careful not to let the tears fall, but his lips were already quivering and a single tears rolled down his cheek as his eyes remained fixed on the window.

"….I'm sorry" Sawyer spoke softly, James' head turned rapidly to meet his fathers eyes. Looking at him as if he never expected _him _to be the one that apologises for anything.

-----------------

When they finally got back to his apartment James was already asleep, he placed him gently in his bed. Careful not to wake him, he stumbled out tripping over one of James toys that he'd left lying around. He was just about to go to bed when the sound of his phone ringing made him run across the apartment to grab it. He didn't want James waking up, that was all he needed.

"What?" He mumbled down the phone.

"Sawyer?" The voice answered, it sounded scared, helpless, maybe even tired.

"Yeah?"

"I don't wana run anymore"

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**Ok, so Kate doesnt want to run anymore. Whats gona happen next?? Well i already know but ideas are welcome. So the only thing left to say is 'Please review' and thanks to all those that have so far, your great! **

**Next chap- Sawyer visits somewhere he'd never thought he'd go...ever! and you havent seen the last of Racheal Brennan. (anyone remember Tom Brennan?? Kate's flashback) **


	9. Reappearances

Reappearances

_She could feel the water round her feet, she pushed hard against the door, praying for it to open, but it wouldn't budge. The water on the other side to strong for her to fight. She knew if she didn't get out of the car soon. She would drown._

_The water was now waist high as the car submerged even further down to the bottom of the river. She crawled desperately to the backseat, she placed her fingers in the gap of the back window were the water was rushing in. She pushed hard, hoping that the glass would budge. Then the glint of the gun laid of the chair caught her eye, she picked it up, hoping that this was her way out. She smashed it against the glass over and over, precious seconds ticking by as she continued to pound the glass. _

_Then small fractures began spreading the glass as finally it began to crack. Pushing the gun into the back of her jeans she eased herself out of the window._

_As she swam out, the water felt like it was trying to push her back in, that she was meant to go down with this car. She fought against it, her arms felt so weak though, she wanted to just give up, let the water take her, but that's not the Kate she knew. She wasn't ever going to give up. She faintly heard the car creak as it hit the bottom of the river, the current pushing her under as she tried her best to swim to the surface. _

_Every muscle ached as she swam with everything she had to the top, barely missing the rocks that was now everywhere she turned. Then as she floated down the river the current becoming stronger every second, she felt the suction pulling her under again, her legs kicked against it forcing herself to stay above water, but her whole body was frozen, she could no longer feel the warmth of her hands, or the aching of her legs.The only thing she felt was the arms of her thin jacket being tugged from her body, eventually it removed itself and she watched as it hit the rocks ahead, clinging to it just as much as she was clinging to the fact that maybe just maybe she could survive. _

_Then she noticed the huge tree with branches hanging over the river, if she moved a little closer she could grab one and pull herself to the other side of the bank. It was as if someone had gave her another life line, she only had to swim a little bit, but every movement made her body ache, she bobbed underwater again, pulling herself to the surface, each time made her loose her energy and will to grab the branch a little more. But the rocks ahead was closing in, the gaps smaller to pass through. She had to grab onto this tree, or she _would _die._

_But she did reach the branch and manage to slowly pull herself onto the grassed bank. She was cold, hungry, exhausted and had no where to go. _

_As far as she knew, she was dead. Right? _

_---------------_

"Ok man…its gona be ok, you just stay here and I'll pick ya up in a little while" Sawyer looked down at James who was staring at the other children, running and chasing each other around the huge play group.

"I don't want you t'go" James whined, grabbing Sawyers hand and pulling him in.

"I have to, I cant stay…I'm not allowed" Sawyer added, looking up and himself taking in the chaos. If he stayed he'd most defiantly die.

"Why?"

"Coz am not"

"Why?"

"_Because_" Sawyer answered, turning to go out of the door when a little girl ran up to him, tugging at his leg.

"Who's you?" The little girl, Kayla asked.

"Erm…I'm…I'm James' d-….I'm just dropping James off" Sawyer answered, then thinking back and asking himself why he did answer. He looked at James one last time, who was taking in the little girls appearance. Her short brown hair sticking out everywhere while her huge brown eyes looked up at Sawyer.

"Why y'goin? My mommy's over there" The little girl pointed into a direction in the far corner, to a women surrounded by screaming children and flying balls which was being hurtled from the ball pool. Sawyer looked at her, she looked worse than him. He watched as she downed another cup of…. transylvania goofy juice.

"Well I gota go…" Sawyer persisted, he was not staying here with a whole tribe of ear-piercing children and he was certainly not drinking transylvania goofy juice!

"_Why_?" Both children whined. Kayla tugging at his leg trying to pull him into the madness while James grabbed his hand and also began tugging at him to come further into there wonderful world of fun.

"Fine!…but I'm only staying for five minutes…that's it, then am gone"

_Five minutes later. _

"Ow!" Sawyer turned round quickly, trying to find the person that just threw the huge red plastic ball at his head. He looked over into the direction of the ball pool, to two mischievous children that stood grinning at him, waist high in multi-coloured balls.

"It doesn't hurt after a while" Rachael, Kayla's mom laughed, while taking another sip from the juice box in front of her.

"Yeah well…I wont be here in a while"

"Yeah, you don't look the kinda guy that hangs round in these places"

"I'm not" Sawyer replied, taking another sip of the stupid juice, that was in front of him. He could not stay any longer! Not just because of the balls that kept hitting him every second or the screaming children that surrounded his feet or even the baby that was nearly sick on him. He had to leave for Kate. She'd called him saying she didn't want that life anymore, she wanted a life with him and James but if she stopped running then…then she'd…he couldn't even bear thinking about it. All he knew was he _had_ to leave.

"So…is that your son?"

"Erm…which one?" Sawyer tried to doge the conversation, hoping she'd just drop it, as he began standing from the stupid clown stool he was sat on.

"Blonde hair blue eyes…right there"

"Erm…yeah" Sawyer practically whispered. "She yours?"

"Yep and Connor, he's somewhere about" Rachael replied, taking a subconscious look around for him as she spoke.

"Well i gota g-ow!" Sawyer yelled as he again got hit with a ball, this time a smaller blue one, he looked round and saw Kayla and James battling there way out of the ball pool, each taking it in turns to throw the balls at him, which he carefully managed to dodge as he made his way to the exit of this ball throwing, transylvania drinking, child screaming war.

---------------

Sawyer picked James up a few hours later, he head laid over his shoulder and he gently tried to find his keys, buried somewhere in his pocket. He could feel James' breathing becoming more peaceful and he looked over his shoulder to see his eyes fluttering shut, then open again as he slowly drifted to sleep.

Finally he opened the door, his eyes immediately locked on the shadowed figure stood in the hallway, he flicked the next light on, revealing the person.

"Hi"

"Hi?!….hi? You left again and the first thing you say is hi?" Sawyer's voice yelled through the tiny apartment, James' body became ridged as he jumped up at the sound of the raised voice. Sawyer himself didn't even know why he was angry at her, but the thought of her just leaving them like she did, burned him inside. What if she did it again? Just up and leave without a word? What would they do this time? Would she expect him to come after her yet again? Would she even come back the next time?

"What did you want me to say?"

"….You could at least start with an explanation"

"Mommy!" James struggled against Sawyers clutch but eventually climbed down and ran over to Kate who hugged and kissed him.

"Hey baby…are you ok?" Kate asked kneeling down to his level and looking into his huge clear blue eyes as she spoke.

"Yep…I'm tired though" James yawned, taking a few tentative steps towards Sawyer who immediately picked him up, Kate looked at the unusual picture of father and son. She watched as Sawyer walked into what she assumed was James room, laying his down on the bed, even laying next to him. She watched as he took a book out of the drawn, she listened to the soft drawl of his voice read the lines perfectly. She herself began losing herself in the calmness of his words.

When he stopped she came back to reality and suddenly a strange feeling of jealousy came over her. She had always been the one that tucked him in at night, comforted him when he cried, watched as each day he did or leant something new which made her laugh through the darkest of times. And now Sawyer had come along, and she felt like he had stole those times from her. But the only person she could blame was herself. She'd left him. Just like she left everyone she loved.

"Kate….Kate" Sawyer whispered, slowly lifting his body from the bed, and walking towards her.

"….What?" Kate shook her head, taking the ridiculous thoughts out of her head, her son loved her and he always would.

"I'm sor-" Sawyer started but was cut off by the loud pounding on the door. He stalked out of the bedroom, Kate following close behind. He fumbled with the keys in his hand as he tried to unlock the door. As the latch clicked open the person on the other side had already flung the door ajar.

"Katherine Austin your under arrest for murder"

**--------------------**

**Ok so I hope you all enjoyed the chap. Please review! Thanks to everyone who already has. Now just in case you haven't worked it out (if you haven't, my fault) but the women that was staying in the motel next to Kate that told the police is Rachael Brennan, Tom Brennan's wife, Kate's childhood sweetheart. She also made a reappearance in this chap as she was with Sawyer in the playgroup. Just thought I would explain again (i think i did last chap) :P Please review :D**


	10. The Beginning Of The End

The Beginning Of The End

Once something ends, something always begins.

"Can I just say goodbye to my son?" Kate asked as the officer grabbed her roughly, causing Sawyer to grab his arm in return, because he _was_ willing to fight for her.

"I'm sorry…you ca-"

"Come on….let her just say goodbye, he's four years old" Sawyer interrupted before releasing his grasp on the man and Kate also felt the release of her arms as she hurried into the small bedroom.

Once in the confined space, she ran to the window, opening it and looking for a way out. Nothing expect, down. She sighed heavily to herself as she realised what she had to do. She found herself cursing Sawyer for living in a stupid apartment block. Finding herself climbing out of the window, her heart in her mouth, she put her foot on the ledge then holding onto the top of the window climbed across the next, which wasn't very far, she assumed she was now at the next apartment to Sawyers, two windows more and there was a balcony with emergency stairs. She could easily get away, as long as Sawyer prevented the officer getting into the room.

"How longs she gona be?" The officer asked, getting impatient as he tried to look round the door, to which Sawyer had blocked.

"Do you have kids?…how would you like it if you had to say goodbye to one? Then when he asks were are you going?, you face the choice of telling him the truth or making something up that possibly wouldn't hurt as much. " Sawyer replied, squaring up to the other man, hoping that maybe he would understand and from the look in his eyes, just maybe he did.

"Ok a couple more minutes wouldn't hurt" The officer answered, to which Sawyer took a sigh of relief.

----

The wind whipped against Kate's face, her hands were a funny mixture of being warm and sticky, possible from the sweat of the fear of clinging on, and being cold from the nights harsh air. _One more window, one more window, that's it then, you've done it, you've got away. _She kept telling herself over and over again, but this window was the furthest of them all, and it was open, she could see the tacky purple curtain blowing out wildly, just like her hair was doing now. She shuffled her feet to the very edge of the window sill, praying that she would make it to the last one. Then that's it. Down the emergency stairs and she's gone, just like that.

----

"Ok your gona have to step aside…" The officer was now deadly serious, Sawyer had to move, he could tell that he knew he was stalling as he put one hand up in protest, but dropped it as he was really out of stalling techniques. _"…now_"

"Just five more minutes…" Sawyer reasoned but the man had, had enough, he was going in that room whether or not Sawyer allowed him.

"I'm sorry, she shouldn't even be in there…now sir, _please_ move aside" The officer persisted, moving round Sawyer to the room.

Sawyer felt his heart beating faster and faster, his hands sweating, his mouth dry, the officers hand was now on the door, pushing it down with one almighty swoop. Sawyer closed his eyes, _please_, _please_, _please_ have just gone. Just run. He heard the passing of cars, and felt the cool nights air on his bare arms. Then a stumble, but no sound. No pleas for one more minute, no cursing or kicking against the restraint. He heard and felt the sound of the window slamming shut, the quiet mumbling from James, who stirred in his sleep, but didn't wake. Not yet anyway.

The pounding of feet coming towards him made him nervous, anxious. She'd gone, hadn't she?

"Where the hell is she?!"

"What?, you mean she's not in there?" Sawyer humoured, the mans face grew more red and wild with every second that passed, but every second to Sawyer was a second more that Kate had to run and he had to give her ever second he had. "Look…" The officer took a threatening step forward "If you don't tell me-"

They both jumped to the sound of what sound like cars colliding, drivers shouting, screams and cries, seconds later flashing lights illuminated the small bedroom behind them. James began mumbling again, he could hear his feet patterning the wooden floor just above the sirens, he felt a small tap on the leg, he turned and looked down at the little boy who was rubbing his eyes. "Where's mommy?"

Sawyer felt his mouth open, the taste of the nights air touching his lips, his throat creaked as he tried to form a sentence, but nothing came. He could feel the anger of the man behind him. He wanted an answer. Now. So did James. But all he wanted to do was turn and run, follow in Kate's footprints and at last they could be the couple, the partners that they never thought they could be.

He felt two tiny hands cling to his leg, as distance screams started again, the lights slowly stopping, the sound of an engine beginning but no loud sirens or flashing lights followed.

"Where's mommy?" James persisted, his lips trembling and he grew smaller with every passing moment that Sawyer stared into his blue eyes that mirrored his own. His face crumpled and any second Sawyer could tell tears were going to be falling, cries would rack his body as once again it was the two of them.

"Sir…where is she?" Now the officer began again, James was crying, the man moving closer to him, James clinging more. The pressure was building and all Sawyer wanted was to close his eyes and escape this situation that Kate had somehow managed to create.

"I-I don't know….I don't know" Sawyer could feel James eyes on him and it made him scared that James now knew everything was not alright. Then the officer pulled out a radio and left the apartment. Now it was just the two of them again. James eyes were still on him, waiting for an answer, waiting for comfort because once again he'd been left behind.

-------

He woke to the sound of the phone ringing. Kate. He tried to move but small hands clutched his own. He looked down and saw James sleeping soundly, his blonde hair sweeping over his eyes, two slight dimples appearing as he breathed in.

The phone continued to ring, Sawyer carefully slipped out of the bed, stumbling toward the kitchen and picking up the phone with one rapid movement.

"Kate?"

"Sawyer?"

"Jack?"

"Listen Sawyer….its Kate…I've been trying to find your number all night, Sawyer….Kate died-"

"What?!…No she was with me and the kid last night" Sawyers anger began to rise, he paced the floor, subconsciously looking for a letter or note, but knowing there wasn't going to be any. She'd played follow the trail before, she wouldn't do it again. Then his eyes cast upon the old, crumpled note, that she first gave him. He still had it. After all this time, he still had it.

"I didn't know that…she never regained consciousness…she was hit from behind by a car at high speed she didn't have a ch-"

"_Stop!…_don't, she's coming back….were gona find her…she had to leave…the cops…" Sawyer's mind flashed with images, Kate getting hit, her lying there in the middle of the road, he put the phone back on the receiver, it wasn't true, this wasn't happening, it wasn't, it was some dream, she'd faked her own death just like before. She _was _coming back. She had too.

He grabbed the laptop, scanned his email. None. He looked back, trying to find the one with the link. He watched the street, just a few people walking down, coffee in hands, briefcase in the other. She really was….gone. She wasn't ever coming back, was she?

Taking weary steps back into the small bedroom, James bedroom, he placed himself by his sons little body, his rhyhmatic breathing the same as before, he closed his eyes, and she was there looking back. His throat grew heavy, his eyes burned. He could feel her touch on him, her breath against his neck, her sweet mummers of nothingness into his ear. In the faint distance he could hear the lapping of the shore, and her warm body was beside him as they laid in his enclosed tent. If he could just go back, right back to the beginning then maybe the end would be different. But deep down he knew. It wouldn't, it couldn't. They'd made there path long before the island.

The only thing he had left of her was him. There son that looked more like him everyday. They only thing that reminded him of her was the way he cried, the way his lips pursed together tightly. That was all her.

It was her end, but there beginning.

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Please review, this is the last chapter :( So, please this is your last chance to tell me how, awful? Good? I've done. I would really appreciate it, I've really enjoyed writing this. I may do a sequel but only If people review and tell me that they want one. Ideas for a sequel are welcome! (I have none, but would really like to do one) So all that's left to say is thanks to everyone who has read this, who has reviewed, alerted and everything else! You've been great :D


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